Why are Ballos' Teeth White?

Nov 12, 2013 at 7:25 PM
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he dyed them with white dye because he was bored
 
Nov 12, 2013 at 8:10 PM
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I bet the string in those bows used by the angels are made from dental floss.
 
Nov 12, 2013 at 11:47 PM
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Obviously Ballos was an exemplar, known for having the brightest whites in all the kingdom. That's why they adored him, more than their king. The king, enraged that he couldn't find anything that could outmatch the power of white teeth, decided he would have no choice but to throw Ballos in prison, where he and his white teeth would be tucked away forever. And just to kick a man while he was down, the king ordered Ballos to be punished brutally and cruelly until Ballos would finally give in. But no matter how many times the king commanded Ballos' teeth be punched out, they remained perfectly in tact. No one would ever live to have whiter teeth than him.

(Yeah, I know that theory is blatantly flawed in some way, but that was fun to write while it lasted. :D)

Of course, how would you know that the whites inside Ballos are teeth? Surely he could have worn dentures, having lived those hundreds of years. Or maybe, when he opens his mouth, it's just white inside. Like a light void with empty space within his mouth.
 
Nov 13, 2013 at 1:15 AM
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obviously, the bacteria that would otherwise inhabit ballos's teeth are afraid of his power, and so they stay away from him forever, by staying on the sides of the room. and that is why ballos's teeth are white.
 
Nov 13, 2013 at 1:17 AM
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I was originally gonna put in that Ballos was in fact a eunuch by choice because he prefers his teeth more than his own pleasure, but that would contradict him having a son.
 
Nov 13, 2013 at 1:40 AM
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Teeth > Pleasure both IRL and in a game... :cool:
 
Nov 13, 2013 at 6:28 AM
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TLincoln said:
I was originally gonna put in that Ballos was in fact a eunuch by choice because he prefers his teeth more than his own pleasure, but that would contradict him having a son.
Accidents happen...
 
Nov 13, 2013 at 11:10 PM
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I keep my teeth in tip top shape with Colgate's brands of "fresh confidence" and "cavity protection", these brands will keep your teeth a pearly white too! I never noticed how clean they looked before but it looks like he be trying to impress someone special.
 
Nov 14, 2013 at 3:37 PM
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He uses Crest ProHealth.
 
Nov 14, 2013 at 8:23 PM
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Ballos could use Crest WhiteStrips whenever, but even his empty soul is conscious enough to know he'll make a hole in the time-space continuum if he puts them on.
 
Nov 23, 2013 at 9:36 PM
Um... Chosen One? Yeah that'll work. : P
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Ballos is most likely orange because of some sort of mutation from all the magic power and torture. Maybe the King who tortured him let him keep his white teeth because he liked white teeth too. Or maybe because Pixel wanted them to be white.
(This thread was very funny.)
 
Dec 21, 2013 at 7:17 AM
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When Ballos goes into his final form, where his teeth once were are red faces with an expression of horror on them.

Conclusion: Giygas keeps Ballos' teeth clean.
 
Dec 27, 2013 at 2:18 AM
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One of the torchers he was put through was the permanent perfect dental hygene. You get a briliant smile, but it hurts like hell.
 
Jan 22, 2014 at 7:04 PM
Um... Chosen One? Yeah that'll work. : P
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Ah, I finally got it. Pixel wanted his teeth to contrast from the rest of his body. This seems pretty plausible to me.
 
Jul 4, 2014 at 10:14 PM
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p175358-0-colgatetotalcleanminttoothpaste.jpg
 
Jul 12, 2014 at 6:53 PM
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He always seemed like a pimp.
 
Jul 20, 2014 at 11:32 AM
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Every day he teleports off of the island to go to walgreens and get toothpaste. Why every day you may ask? Because he has giant teeth and uses it all up in two brushes.
 
Sep 14, 2014 at 4:58 PM
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funwillfunwill said:
Every day he teleports off of the island to go to walgreens and get toothpaste. Why every day you may ask? Because he has giant teeth and uses it all up in two brushes.
I wouldn't ask why every day, I would ask, why walgreens?
 
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