I've been thinking about this for a while now, but...in the long run, is the concept of making an entire frickin' Cave Story toy line really a good idea? Well, I mean, at face value, anyone would say yes. Can you even imagine how freaking adorable the Mimiga plushies alone, especially Jack and Toroko and Sue, would be? And that's not even mentioning how god-damned cute Balrog, Quote, Curly, and perhaps even the Doctor would be. Long story short, I can already feel my money loosening itself from my wallet. But then when you consider the deeper implications of this concept, you may start to realize the problem with this. Although watching a bunch of adorkable little girls having tea parties with their Mimiga plushies and giant teddy Balrogs on countless Youtube videos would undoubtedly be the cutest fucking thing since the way that Toroko was portrayed in Cavernous Storybook...you see, that right there is exactly the problem with this idea. It's simply too fucking cute for its own good. It's exactly the type of marketing ploy that Nintendo pulled with Pokémon. If even a fucking big-ass Nintendo franchise like Pokémon felt annoyingly overexposed after receiving such royal merchandising treatment, can you even imagine how comically overrated Cave Story would begin to feel? In a lot of ways, it would most likely go from a game that even 8-year-old kids had deep and philosophical thought about to a literally nonstop fucking fangirl squeegasm marathon of aww, would you just look at those cuddly little cutie-pies! OMG, I WANT ONE SO BAD!!! Also, the game would be seen as turning into yet another profitable cash cow. So, even after hearing all of that explicitly obvious encouragement to say NO to this idea, can you still find it in your heart to say yes? Personally, I can, because that's just how desperately I need to be able to hug and cuddle and snuggle with Jack and Sue. Toroko, too.