cave stry

Was browsing reddit, and found this post on r/cavestory: https://redd.it/8gmr9n Thought it was interesting. If we could get some translation of the text, that would be great. Link: http://909.xii.jp/blog/2011/11/03/洞窟物語のウラガワのウラガワ・過去作品補足編/