The SPAM Thread

Discussion in 'Satellite Lounge' started by DragonBoots, Oct 30, 2010.

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  1. Oct 30, 2010
    My scales bring all the bears to the yard~
    "Heavy swords for sale. Suitable for most RPG Protagonists. Apply now!"
    Join Date: Jan 1, 2008
    Location: Abandoned Mine Shaft, -1455, 4, 525
    Posts: 1955
    Age: 25
    I mean the actual kind.
    In your emaiil inbox.

    Apparently a US soldier wants a (random) Canadian Citizen to help him abscond with millions of dollars from Iraq:
    Shoud I trust him? o:
  2. Oct 30, 2010
    Creating A Legacy...
    Bobomb says: "I need a hug!"
    Join Date: Sep 6, 2009
    Location: The Balcony
    Posts: 836
    Age: 21
    If he had email he could contact back to base and ask for an evac duee to suicide bombers and his home country would proudly collect the money, dunno about you but in the middle of a war I wouldn't sit down and compose an email XD
  3. Oct 30, 2010
    Senior Member
    "Fly, Fly, Fly!"
    Join Date: Oct 29, 2010
    Location: IN HELL
    Posts: 145
    (you realize that most of the war is spent waiting around for something to happen, right?)

    I always get a whole bunch of stuff with random kanji (err... japanese characters, Firefox spellcheck doesn't know that word) in the subject line. Or at least I think they're random. And a name, Perkins something. If it was in any other context than my spam folder it might almost be kind of creepy.
  4. Oct 30, 2010
    inactive user
    "All your forum are belong to us!"
    Join Date: Feb 13, 2010
    Location: undead parish
    Posts: 625
    lol, all of this

    pretty sure we all know what kanji is here.

    don't have to explain it to us, thank you very much

    i could sound just like you if I wanted to and believe me that wouldn't be pleasant for any of us :p

    anyway, ontopic: i remember recieving an email from someone who tried to bullshit me that I knew them quite well, but otherwise it was the same "send $500 and we'll reroute $1.5Million into your bank account" crap. I don't get much spam.
  5. Oct 30, 2010
    Senior Member
    "Fly, Fly, Fly!"
    Join Date: Oct 29, 2010
    Location: IN HELL
    Posts: 145
    Actually, I was just checking if I had horribly mangled the word to the point of unreadability. What's your problem anyway? What did I ever do to you?
  6. Oct 30, 2010
    inactive user
    "All your forum are belong to us!"
    Join Date: Feb 13, 2010
    Location: undead parish
    Posts: 625
    You didn't. You can trust EVERYONE on these forums to correct you if you make a mistake like that, lol
    it's not really your fault, something about you just rubs me the wrong way

    don't worry too much about it, I'm kinda prejudiced against new users xD

    it kinda feels like you're trying too hard to fit in here, so much so that you stick out. just, go with the flow, y'know? be natural.
  7. Oct 30, 2010
    Creating A Legacy...
    Bobomb says: "I need a hug!"
    Join Date: Sep 6, 2009
    Location: The Balcony
    Posts: 836
    Age: 21
    Man I can feel the merlinoboy feeling ALL over again...
    Meh we like new users it just seems new users are way too defensive, calm it down a bit dude
  8. Oct 30, 2010
    Freakish but subtly cute
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: Aug 28, 2009
    Location: space or some shit
    Posts: 5312
    Oh! I get lots of this.
    Here's my top picks of the month.

    Just like a real Spamboot
    From: Horacio Osofsky
    Subject: How're you doing?

    No=Staying*In^Your Pants? pdzrddjo!

    <Link I'm not going to click or repost>

    Alcibiades the contrary when camillus. Afterwards by theseus himself down the athenians. Whereas before all italy with.
    Law that hannibal had heard the army. Meantime the island of small number
    Unless it that he put in opinion. Timoleon and it seems to save themselves. But after these men that.
    From: karen shaw
    Subject: i will help you

    Have you fallen for Nigerian Bank Scams? Send us money and we will reimburse you!
    From: Public Communication Department
    Subject: Public Service Announcement

    The Federal Ministry of Information and Communications
    Address: Radio House,
    Herbert Macaulay Way (South),
    Area 10, P.M.B. 247,
    Garki - Abuja

    To all scam victims,

    The Federal Government of Nigeria has agreed that the sum of twenty thousand Dollars ($20,000) each should be transferred to every scam victims from the Indemnity Fund apportioned by the Federal Government of Nigeria to compensate every scam victims as part of the grand celebration of Nigeria‘s 50th independence anniversary ('Golden Jubilee') on 1st of October, 2010.

    Note that this is the first scam victims compensation programme from Nigerian Government, we have never held any scam victims compensation programme in Nigeria. Do not be deceived.

    If you have been scammed contact the Compensation Commission at their email address stated below, tell them you have been scammed and you want them to reimburse you with the sum of $20,000 as instructed by Nigerian Government, send them your FULL NAME and ADDRESS for verification and after verifications if truly you have been scammed you will be reimbursed.

    Compensation Commission email address: <LolHotmail>

    Warning: Please if you know you have not been scammed do not contact the compensation commission because your details will be verified at Western Union and MoneyGram offices to see if truly you have sent money to Nigeria.

    We are Projecting favourably the image of the government and people of Nigeria locally and internationally through a proactive mechanism (in line with global best practices) of informing, enlightening and educating Nigerians and the International Community about Nigeria.

    Yours sincerely,
    Miss. Stephanie Mamuzo
    Public Communication Department
    The Federal Ministry of Information and Communications
    If you receive an e-mail or fax from someone you do not know requesting your assistance in a financial transaction, such as the transfer of a large sum of money into an account, or claiming you are the next of kin to an wealthy person who has died, or the winner of some obscure lottery and suffered a significant financial loss related to the advance fee fraud (so-called "Nigerian scam"), please contact your local Secret Service field office. The Secret Service retains these messages for future investigations.

    Any type of Crime; Write to the Federal Trade Commission and also contact your State Attorneys General. Your state Attorney General or local office of consumer protection is also listed in the government pages of your telephone book.
    In Nigeria, they get the ministers to handle international money affairs. This is also probably one of the most common types of message.
    From: Rev. Dr. James Abraham
    Subject: Urgent reply needed......

    Are you dead or alive? kindly reconfirm this as soon as possible..
    From the records of outstanding contractors/inheritance due for payment with the Federal Government of Nigeria, your name and company was discovered as next on the list of the outstanding payment who have not yet received their payments.Your payment will be released to you as soon as you respond to this letter. Also note that from the record in my file here, your outstanding contract/inheritance payment is US$25M united states dollars.
    Meanwhile, in the course of our General Auditing and Account revision of the final quarter of the year 2010 ending within few months now, we discovered that the Bank Accounts belonging to some Benefactors have been changed on the basis that the owners have died some time last year or have given out an authorization note of change of data.

    After the investigations however, it was revealed that there are Foreigners who are collaborating with Retired Staffs to make these changes illegally without the knowledge of the Bonafide Beneficiaries and one traced to your own change is one Mr Rick Jones who said you are dead, hence they have forwarded some documents of funeral service held for you so as to divert your fund. They have also forwarded this bank account below as the new account that will receive your funds ($25 Million) .Bank: Hang Seng Bank, Bank Address: 83 Des Veoux Road , Central - Hong Kong, Account Name: Rick Jones, Account Number: 235-325172-882, Bank Code: 024, Swift Code: HASEHKHH.

    But we wanted to confirm if actually this is true and hence decided to write to your email address which after 2 days from now and there is no response, we will then know that you are dead indeed and go on with the transfer. If proved otherwise by you that you are not dead and you did not send anyone to claim your fund and change your account. Please forward to us all the your particulars including your full name, Telephone number,contact address, sex, age and occupation as well as your identification either international passport or dirver's liecense.These details from you will help to assist us to reach a conclusion that you are not dead. Anything contrary to this claim will help us charge this man to court and prosecute him while your fund will be paid to you immediately without any further delay. You have to get back to us on time for us to commence legal proceedings against Mr. Rick Jones and his accomplices.
    Kindly re-confirm to us the following informations bellow:
    Your names in full,
    Your contact Address,
    Telephone/fax numbers and Cell,
    occupation, age, and sex, marital status,
    copy of international passport or driver's Lincense.
    As soon as I received these information, I shall get back to you on what next to do .


    Rev. Dr. James Abraham,
    Email: <lolhotmail>
    International Remittance Director.
    Ceo Intercontinental Bank Plc.
    Forgive me for I have sinned against you
    From: Mrs.Helena

    Dear Beloved One,

    Warm greeting to you ,

    I am Mrs.Helena a cousin sister to your late friend also native of your country.I was finding it very difficult to make this direct confession to you before I realize the that only way I can really move on is if I make this confession to you because i have sinned against you without your consent and I would like to apologies.Please i want you to read and understand this email to enable you find a place in your heart to forgive me.I know that you are not aware that my late cousin who is one of your numerous friends short-listed you as one of his beneficiaries before he died.According to my late cousin,it stands as an appreciation of what you did in the past.

    Am really so sorry to inform you how I conspired with my late cousin’s attorney and claimed the money that was legally assigned to you by my late cousin your friend.I will admit that I have a difficult time dealing with unsettled mind after this bad act,and I know is hard to forgive a thing like this but please forgive me .It was out of greediness which Indeed the major fault of mine.I hope that you will focus on good memories you have experienced in life rather than this painful behavior of mine.

    I really know how you feel in your mind which is why I intend to attach my picture on my next email.I know this email may have come to you as a big surprise because secret when revealed surprises anyone.Although I was supposed to meet with you but due to my health condition I traveled to Japan for medical attention hence the reason for contacting you through your email.I believe your forgiveness will make me happy and strengthen me in many other aspect of my life. Your anger will only hinder me from moving on from this time in my life.Please forgive me for everything dear beloved one.If only I'd have known,It would never have happened.

    Many thanks for your forgiveness. I shall give you full details as soon as i receive your reply through my alternative email: <Gee-Mail> because i normally check it.

    Please endeavor to contact me through my alternative email: <Gee-Mail>

    Mrs.Helena Kolb
    Well, I'm convinced.
    From: No name given
    Subject: A my po-prezhnemu zhivem._obzy

    W=O=W B=A=B=E==S R=U=S=S=I=A T=U=R=R G=O=O=D!

    Что ни я, ни брат Хоакин, ни Васко де Агилар, ни наш проводник, ничего подобного увидеть не смогли, а посему солдатам приказали ступать далее под страхом сурового наказания. И что один из них, Фелипе Альварес, подчинился, хотя Васко де Агилару пришлось его для этого избить; второй же, Франсиско Бальбона, бросился бежать назад, криком моля Пресвятую Богородицу о помощи. Что бежал он с изрядной скоростью и остановить его не было возможности, так что через несколько минут он скрылся уже за поворотом сакба. Что через м

    *As a note, all that russian shit was in white text. I didn't realize it was there until I tried to copypaste it.
    Sometimes the subject line says it all...
    From: TrustableViagra reseller
    Subject: Hi <MyEmail>, hits are chaper today. companies the breed for
    *a random shitty newsletter with links

    From: Mitzie Kubin
    Subject: Time for your second puberty phase
    *The message is blank...

    EDIT: 6ty you're one to talk just leave it alone.
  9. Oct 30, 2010
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: May 6, 2009
    Location: ᵐᵉᵐᵉˢ
    Posts: 2132
    Age: 20

    but yeah, I don't get much spam.
    Mostly spam with titles like:

    Must Watch Videos - SNL's Andy Samberg dies for Anne Hathaway just to be the MTV Movie Awards host! and more...

    strategically lettered so your inbox shows "Must Watch Videos - SNL's Andy Samberg dies..." to try and make you click it.
  10. Oct 30, 2010
    Pirate Member
    "Heavy swords for sale. Suitable for most RPG Protagonists. Apply now!"
    Join Date: Dec 26, 2007
    Location: Lithuania
    Posts: 1936



    W W W . C H I N A Z R H . C O M


  11. Oct 30, 2010
    Pirate Member
    "Big Joe Tire and Battery Restaurant! Opening Soon! Eat at Big Joes!"
    Join Date: Jun 29, 2010
    Location: Wandering the lands of Norrath. Or Azeroth. Or oth
    Posts: 509
    Age: 22


    This is an automated notification regarding your account. Some or all of your contact information was recently modified through the Account Management website.

    *** If you made recent account changes, please disregard this automatic notification.

    *** If you did NOT make any changes to your account, we recommend you log in to Account Management review your account settings.

    If you cannot sign into Account Management using the link above, or if unauthorized changes continue to happen, please contact Blizzard Billing & Account Services for further assistance.

    Billing & Account Services can be reached at 1-800-59-BLIZZARD (1-800-592-5499 Mon-Fri, 8AM-8PM Pacific Time) or at

    Account security is solely the responsibility of the accountholder. Please be advised that in the event of a compromised account, Blizzard representatives will typically lock the account. In these cases the Account Administration team will require faxed receipt of ID materials before releasing the account for play.


    The Support Team
    Blizzard Entertainment
    Online Privacy Policy

    now, this might make some sense... if i ever had an account with blizzard.
  12. Oct 30, 2010
    Lvl 1
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: May 28, 2008
    Location: PMMM MMO
    Posts: 3548
    Age: 23
    It might be possible that someone used your email when they registered or something, since that message looks like it might be legit (I wouldn't really know though, I've never had a blizzard account).
  13. Nov 3, 2010
    Presidential Supporter of Greens
    "Big Joe Tire and Battery Restaurant! Opening Soon! Eat at Big Joes!"
    Join Date: May 7, 2009
    Location: United States of America
    Posts: 516
    Age: 20
    No, those e-mails are fake. He must have put his e-mail account in a different website, thus spambots make e-mails to that account saying that their WoW account was banned for some reason, and then they give you a fake link to a login screen forcing you to put your information in it. I've gotten those e-mails a million times on my old e-mail account, and my WoW account has never been phased. (It has been hacked before, but not by clicking the links in the fake e-mails.)

    I could have sworn I used to get e-mails on how to get the best orgasms for women before.
  14. Nov 11, 2010
    Bobomb says: "I need a hug!"
    Join Date: Apr 5, 2008
    Posts: 776
    Fuck you iPad. My device is longer!
  15. Dec 10, 2010
    Neophyte Member
    "Fresh from the Bakery"
    Join Date: Dec 9, 2010
    Posts: 4
    I want to be your google friend. :)
    How was your day
    i hope all is well
    we give thanks to God
    Am so happy to contact
    you today please i want
    us to be goog friend i pray
    before contacting you will
    all my heart please EMAIL me
    here ( so
    i con tell you move about me
    with my photos God bless you
    Also tell me about youself thanks
    Pls contact me in my inbox I D

    Yours miss gift mabou,
  16. Dec 26, 2010
    professional shit poster extraordinaire
    "Bleep, Bloop, Bleep, Bloop"
    Join Date: Jun 12, 2009
    Location: The Village of Shirtless Men
    Posts: 1604
    Age: 22
    Rawr's was hilarious

    Here's one of mine


    Dear Friend.


    I will like you to help me, in receiving of this fund into your Bank Account .However; it's just my urgent need for foreign partner that made me to contact you for this transaction. I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance Department of BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A) here in Ouagadougou , Burkina Faso. In my department we discovered an abandoned sum of (US$27.2 Million dollars) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign Customer (MR. PAUL LOUIS from Paris, France) who died along with His entire family in July 2003 in a plane crash.

    I am afraid if this money stays in our bank without claim for long period of time, our government will step in because
    The Banking laws here does not allow such huge amount of money to stay
    Dormant for more than 8years. And you will be receiving this money into your Bank account within 10 or 14 banking days.

    The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after Eight years an above, the money will be transferred into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund. I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as foreign partner in respect to the provision of a foreign account, and while 70%would be for me.

    If you agree to my business proposal, further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as I receive your return mail. Make sure you keep this transaction as your top secret and make it confidential till we receive the fund into the account that you will provide to the Bank. Don't disclose it to any body, because the secrecy of this transaction is as well as the success of it, have a great day.

    Place contact me immediately
    Yours faithfully.
    Mrs Mimi Philip

    I am really attracted to your pictures you posted on your page
    I know you don't know me but I'm looking to meet some new people
    Instead of replying to this mail, just go on MSN msger my names
    Add me and send me a line I'll be on all day I am off work
    Xo Maddy

    -----Forwarded Message-----
    From: Madison
    To: Undisclosed recipients
    Sent: Sun, Jan 9, 2011 6:44 am
    Subject: FW: A powerful prayer

    This is neat. innumerable; but I should only mention a few of the chief. God bless. Poor girl, she has so much to forget that it is no wonder that sleep,

    Each and everyone one of us are going through tough times right now, but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that only He can. Keep the faith.
    My instructions were to pick four people that I wanted God to bless, and I picked you. Please pass this to at least (4) people you want to be blessed and a copy back to me.
    This prayer is powerful, and prayer is one of the best gifts we receive.
    There is no cost but a lot of rewards. Let's continue to pray for one another.

    The prayer:
    Father, I ask You to bless my friends, relatives and those that I care deeply for, who are reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask You to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a renewed confidence through your grace. Where there is need, I ask you to fulfill their needs. Bless their homes, families, finances, their goings and their comings. In Jesus' precious name. Amen.

    noise and astonishment of the people, at seeing me rise and walk,

    You must be brave and strong, and help me through the horrible task. with Flimnap the high-treasurer, whose enmity against you is
  17. May 26, 2011
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: May 6, 2009
    Location: ᵐᵉᵐᵉˢ
    Posts: 2132
    Age: 20
    Hi! I'm Nellya. Im the kind women. I don't have man's heat. I want to search men serious relationship. If it is interesting to you, answer me please on my e-mail: I very much wait for your letter. Kisssss Nellya.

    This grammar is beautiful
  18. May 26, 2011
    Totally Invisible
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: Apr 29, 2008
    Posts: 2455
    Age: 11
    That isn't funny! I sent you that letter out of my love for you, not for you to post it on the forums and make fun of me!

    I no longer want your heat.
  19. May 26, 2011
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: May 6, 2009
    Location: ᵐᵉᵐᵉˢ
    Posts: 2132
    Age: 20
    I got a second one just now:

    Hi! My name Nellya. I'm the kind women. I dont have man's heat. I want to search second half for family creation. If you still alone, answer me please on my e-mail: It will be very good if you answer me. Kisssss Nellya.
  20. May 26, 2011
    Captain Fabulous
    I'm... beautiful
    "Life begins and ends with Nu."
    Join Date: Apr 19, 2009
    Location: kill me
    Posts: 3785
    Age: 12
    Family creation?! SIGN ME UP.