Mar 27, 2011 at 12:46 PM
Join Date: Apr 29, 2008
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Posts: 2459
Age: 19
Since these seem popular I wanted to share the one I wrote 10 years ago. As the title implies it's just a standalone story, but if enough people like it maybe I will do a couple more.
This takes place 1 million years after they fly off the island just so you know.
Cave Story Gaiden: Chapter One.
It all started when our adventure-loving...adventurer, Quote, woke up in a magical cornfield. It was the fifth time it had happened. Feeling alarmingly concerned, Quote attacked a banana, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Before the all-seeing eyes of a perpetually displeased diety, he realized that his beloved panties was missing! Immediately he called his annoying neighbor, Curly. Quote had known Curly for (plus or minus) one million years, the majority of which were curious ones. Curly was unique. She was easygoing though sometimes a little... annoying. Quote called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.
Curly picked up to a very sad Quote. Curly calmly assured him that most 3-legged wallabies yawn before mating, yet long-haired sea monkeys usually sassily cringe *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Quote. Why was Curly trying to distract Quote? Because she had snuck out from Quote's with the panties only four days prior. It was a eccentric little panties... how could she resist?
It didn't take long before Quote got back to the subject at hand: his panties. Curly yawned. Relunctantly, Curly invited him over, assuring him they'd find the panties. Quote grabbed his rhinocerus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Curly realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the panties and she had to do it deftly. She figured that if Quote took the tricked out go kart, she had take at least five minutes before Quote would get there. But if he took the time machine? Then Curly would be very screwed.
Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Curly was interrupted by six pestering Mimigass that were lured by her panties. Curly cringed; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling angered, she randomly reached for her gerbil and thoughtfully punched every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the secret vineyard, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the time machine rolling up. It was Quote.
----o0o----
As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at The Salvation Army to pick up a 12-pack of potatos, so he knew he was running late. With a inept leap, Quote was out of the time machine and went indiscriminately jaunting toward Curly's front door. Meanwhile inside, Curly was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the panties into a box of dull pencils and then slid the box behind her time machine. Curly was displeased but at least the panties was concealed. The doorbell rang.
'Come in,' Curly sassily purred. With a careful push, Quote opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some pestering genocidal maniac in a wannabe go-fast Civic,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Curly assured him. Quote took a seat ridiculously unclose to where Curly had hidden the panties. Curly panicked trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But Quote was distracted. A few freaknasty minutes later, Curly noticed a clueless look on Quote's face. Quote slowly opened his mouth to speak.
'...What's that smell?'
Curly felt a stabbing pain in her shin when Quote asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the panties right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A pestering look started to form on Quote's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's carrots from when she used to have pet 3-legged wallabies. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Quote nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Curly could react, Quote thoughtfully lunged toward the box and opened it. The panties was plainly in view.
Quote stared at Curly for what what must've been eight microseconds. Happy as a frickin' monkey, Curly groped earnestly in Quote's direction, clearly desperate. Quote grabbed the panties and bolted for the door. It was locked. Curly let out a enchanting chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Quote,' she rebuked. Curly always had been a little funny-smelling, so Quote knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Curly did something crazy, like... start chucking ninja stars at her or something. In a tragically predictable turn of events, he gripped his panties tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.
Curly looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Quote. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame four days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly she felt a tinge of concern for Quote. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Curly walked over to the window and looked down. Quote was gone.
----o0o----
Just yonder, Quote was struggling to make his way through the haunted thicket behind Curly's place. Quote had severely hurt his double chin during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Mimigass suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the panties. One by one they latched on to Quote. Already weakened from his injury, Quote yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Mimigass running off with his panties.
But then God came down with His congenial smile and restored Quote's panties. Feeling angered, God smote the Mimigass for their injustice. Then He got in His time machine and bolted away with the fortitude of one million legless puppies running from a enlarged pack of South American hissing sloths. Quote jumped with joy when he saw this. His panties was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in six minutes his favorite TV show, Caev Sturei: Teers in the Rane, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When man-eating capybaras meet unborn fetus'). Quote was overjoyed. And so, everyone except Curly and a few weapon of mass destruction-toting disease-carrying chipmunks lived blissfully happy, forever after.
This takes place 1 million years after they fly off the island just so you know.
Cave Story Gaiden: Chapter One.
It all started when our adventure-loving...adventurer, Quote, woke up in a magical cornfield. It was the fifth time it had happened. Feeling alarmingly concerned, Quote attacked a banana, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Before the all-seeing eyes of a perpetually displeased diety, he realized that his beloved panties was missing! Immediately he called his annoying neighbor, Curly. Quote had known Curly for (plus or minus) one million years, the majority of which were curious ones. Curly was unique. She was easygoing though sometimes a little... annoying. Quote called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.
Curly picked up to a very sad Quote. Curly calmly assured him that most 3-legged wallabies yawn before mating, yet long-haired sea monkeys usually sassily cringe *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Quote. Why was Curly trying to distract Quote? Because she had snuck out from Quote's with the panties only four days prior. It was a eccentric little panties... how could she resist?
It didn't take long before Quote got back to the subject at hand: his panties. Curly yawned. Relunctantly, Curly invited him over, assuring him they'd find the panties. Quote grabbed his rhinocerus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Curly realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the panties and she had to do it deftly. She figured that if Quote took the tricked out go kart, she had take at least five minutes before Quote would get there. But if he took the time machine? Then Curly would be very screwed.
Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Curly was interrupted by six pestering Mimigass that were lured by her panties. Curly cringed; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling angered, she randomly reached for her gerbil and thoughtfully punched every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the secret vineyard, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the time machine rolling up. It was Quote.
----o0o----
As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at The Salvation Army to pick up a 12-pack of potatos, so he knew he was running late. With a inept leap, Quote was out of the time machine and went indiscriminately jaunting toward Curly's front door. Meanwhile inside, Curly was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the panties into a box of dull pencils and then slid the box behind her time machine. Curly was displeased but at least the panties was concealed. The doorbell rang.
'Come in,' Curly sassily purred. With a careful push, Quote opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some pestering genocidal maniac in a wannabe go-fast Civic,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Curly assured him. Quote took a seat ridiculously unclose to where Curly had hidden the panties. Curly panicked trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But Quote was distracted. A few freaknasty minutes later, Curly noticed a clueless look on Quote's face. Quote slowly opened his mouth to speak.
'...What's that smell?'
Curly felt a stabbing pain in her shin when Quote asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the panties right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A pestering look started to form on Quote's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's carrots from when she used to have pet 3-legged wallabies. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Quote nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Curly could react, Quote thoughtfully lunged toward the box and opened it. The panties was plainly in view.
Quote stared at Curly for what what must've been eight microseconds. Happy as a frickin' monkey, Curly groped earnestly in Quote's direction, clearly desperate. Quote grabbed the panties and bolted for the door. It was locked. Curly let out a enchanting chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Quote,' she rebuked. Curly always had been a little funny-smelling, so Quote knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Curly did something crazy, like... start chucking ninja stars at her or something. In a tragically predictable turn of events, he gripped his panties tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.
Curly looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Quote. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame four days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly she felt a tinge of concern for Quote. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Curly walked over to the window and looked down. Quote was gone.
----o0o----
Just yonder, Quote was struggling to make his way through the haunted thicket behind Curly's place. Quote had severely hurt his double chin during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Mimigass suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the panties. One by one they latched on to Quote. Already weakened from his injury, Quote yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Mimigass running off with his panties.
But then God came down with His congenial smile and restored Quote's panties. Feeling angered, God smote the Mimigass for their injustice. Then He got in His time machine and bolted away with the fortitude of one million legless puppies running from a enlarged pack of South American hissing sloths. Quote jumped with joy when he saw this. His panties was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in six minutes his favorite TV show, Caev Sturei: Teers in the Rane, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When man-eating capybaras meet unborn fetus'). Quote was overjoyed. And so, everyone except Curly and a few weapon of mass destruction-toting disease-carrying chipmunks lived blissfully happy, forever after.
